Romance Awareness Month

August is ‘Romance Awareness Month’ and during this month, we should all take time to try and create more love and romance in our relationships, whether these are for singles or married couples. Of course we should do this all the time but August is especially dedicated as the time for us to re-energize and revitalize our relationships.

As part of a “Romance Awareness Month” campaign, I recently conducted a “Romance Awareness Survey” to discover what women find to be most romantic. And the findings might surprise you.

When many people speak of ‘Romance’, certain phrases and words jump into someone’s mind automatically. What does the word really mean, or simply put, what does one have to do to be considered romantic? As many men will tell you, being romantic toward their women is not as easy as it first looks. It takes real dedication from the man to win the heart of the woman he loves and be considered romantic by her. Women generally appreciate certain acts from their men such as giving flowers, chocolates, cards and so on. But is this what romance is all about or is there something beyond this?

So what’s the number one thing women consider romantic? According to 72% of the women responding to the survey, its attention from her partner. For one woman, this was “being told by her husband she was irreplaceable.” Imagine how beautiful it is to hear that from your partner?

Coming in a close second, listed by 54% of the women is “helpful gestures”. These are the typically non-romantic chores such as “washing dishes”, “helping around the house”, and “getting the kids ready for bed”. One married woman wrote her most romantic moment was her husband “letting me sleep in on weekday mornings, while making breakfast for the family & getting the kids ready. Then bringing a cappuccino to me in bed when it’s time for me to wake up.”

Doesn’t sound so romantic, does it? This may be what baffles men in understanding women: Men often seek the grand gesture, when perhaps it’s not necessary.

I see this in my private practice as well: Men often get a bad rap for not being romantic. And actually that’s just not true. Men are so eager to please their wives, and that’s often the most important thing for them. However, they aren’t sure just what it takes to make them happy, so they get frustrated and shut down.

Getting to know the person you are dating is the key to meeting their need for romantic expressions. Invest your time and find out what your woman’s likes and dislikes are. You will later find out that this is one of the best-spent investments in your relationship. If your woman loves poetry and you are a pretty good writer, you can write her a poem letting her know how much she is on your mind and how much she means to you. (Even if you’re not a good writer, she’ll appreciate the gesture.) If your woman is a big fan of roses, then by all means get her a fresh bouquet. The point here is find out what it is that tickles the fancy of your woman, and then do your best to provide it. Avoid getting into the trap of thinking that because your last girlfriend was big on chocolates your current woman will love them too.

Always remember that the purpose of being romantic to your woman is to express to her that you love her. Taking time to know what she likes is definitely one of the best ways to do this. It is worth best sex positions noting that women on the average are a lot more emotional than men. Men tend to be rather practical about their views on what constitutes a good gift for a woman. A man might be tempted to think that since her woman loves watching DVDs and does not have a DVD player, buying her one will be well appreciated. But many women will tell you this; buying her a DVD player for her birthday gift just doesn’t cut it as a romantic gift! Many men have difficulty telling what gifts their women view as a practical and which ones they consider romantic. Buying her certain gifts, just because she happens to lack them, may only earn you a thank you while failing to really touch her heart.

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